Evening strangers,

My oh my, its been a long time coming right?

I’ll begin by sincerely apologising to every last one of you because despite me taking the most enormous long ass break from wingingmamahood you’re all still here, supporting, loving, sending messages, leaving comments and continuing to be kind as hell.

I’m grateful for you all, I’ll find a way to show just how much someday… I promise.




Ha Ha Ha, go on admit it. You’ve typed that to me through insta.. hovered your thumb over the send button then thought ‘nahh that might sound a tad in ya face‘ so replaced the whole thing with ‘Hello lovely, everything okay with you and the boys?’

I respond to EVERY last message I receive…

– Stop f*cking lying Joanne…..

Ok Ok I’ll admit, I ignore those..’hello I sell sheep shit and other overpriced products for business and I think you would be great at what I do’ messages, ain’t nobody got time for that.

The messages I do receive from my lovely followers- my friends I LOVE. Its crazy how much of a connection you can obtain with folk you’ve never met, It still amazes me to this day.

Anyhow, I can feel the beginning of an hour long rambling sesh coming on so I’m gonna hit the nail on the head and fill you in on everything that has been going on. A LOT has changed. Grab a cuppa (gotta be 3 sugars though you looneys) a box of biscuits and get yourselves comfortable.


Starting work- 

Most of you will be familiar with this anyway if you follow me on Instagram .

The last time I wrote any content on my blog was when I was a stay at home mum. I won’t go into too much detail on this as I’m gonna be writing a whole new blog post all about the transition… but yeah I currently work in a factory packing chocolates, biscuits, cornflakes, sweets and my effing dignity. Wearing my cushty lil hairnet, ear plugs, overalls and titanic boat work boots that nearly send me ass over tit every second that I move in em’.

Hey’ ho its a job folks. It puts food on the table. It’s for my family. its for my inner strength. It’s for us.

Starting my driving lessons,


I love driving so much! My driving instructor continuously gives me a grilling cos I drive faster than Hamilton but I guess I can work on that. It must feel amazing to have that freedom of hopping into the car and going wherever you like.

(not as simple for the parents like..(soz Miss fightwiththecarseatandterribletoddler)

I’ve gotta feeling I’ll be one of those unfortunate ones that’ll take like 786 attempts to pass their test and all it’ll be down to chuffing parking EVERY TIME. I can’t park for shit.

Gimme a forward facing bay park any day of the week and bop, straight in there no problemo..  but gimme a ‘reverse your vehicle into bay 2.3 with a slight 8.345 angel and i’m all confused as hell.


Mortgage process- 

Right, so me and Jordan have been saving up for a mortgage deposit for quite some time now. Its been draining, boring, stressful and we’ve had to really work hard and pull together.

We found the house of our dreams! Mates.. I fell in love with everything about it. I know it sounds as sad as a sack of spuds but I pictured the boys toddling around in there, crouched on the kitchen floor driving there cars around the edge and driving me around the bend, I imagined myself perched on the sofa beside the door to the garden beaming at my sweethearts whilst they played in the sunshine, I imagined Jordan cooking dinner whilst I sat at the table with my laptop nattering to you lot.

We had our plan set. We knew where we wanted our furniture to go. We knew how we wanted to decorate. We knew all of that.

We had a meeting with our adviser who excitedly gave us the good knews that we could afford this beautiful beautiful home. We placed our holding fee on the house with the biggest back yard (obvs). It had a double drive beside it, there was a lake and access to woodland walkways about 3 minutes from our door and it was just perfect in every possible.

We were given a deadline date of just 4 weeks to exchange contracts and get the rest of our deposit together.


Here’s the shit part which makes me feel just as much pain as I imagine a skip loader running over mi front bum would feel.

Our mortgage process couldn’t continue.

It didn’t actually sink in until a couple of days before the meeting that my work was agency.

To the lenders that isn’t a solid form of income (I completely 100% understand from their side) because they can ‘drop you’ if ya like, whenever it suits them. I needed a contract from work and that was the only thing that let us down.

Imagine how that made me feel?

Because of me… my family can’t get their forever home.

Time for a change,

Despite being ever so grateful to have a job (even if it is just in agency) I need to do the best thing for my family which is to concentrate on getting a contract ASAP, I need to make this right.

So yeah, right now I’m busy working, being a mum and chucking my CV everywhere and anywhere hoping and praying that somebody will take me on. Starting work in the first place was THE BIGGEST deal for me, getting to know how everything works, getting to know the people that work there, trying to fit in when you’re the ‘newbie’ I was terrified. I’ve just got to the stage now where I feel somewhat comfortable doing what i’m doing.

BUT.. am I ‘doing’ the right thing?


I need to think about my family, my little boys. Their future comes before my nervousness at the thought of a new workplace.

What would be the finest thing to do right now do we think? Wait around at my current job ‘hoping’ they give me contract one day so I can get a mortgage and live happily ever after orrr…. get my head down, job hunt and get a contract in a job that’s abit more ‘me’? I’ll be happier, I’ll actually be allowed to paint my nails (one of the most important of all) AND we’ll be able to get our mortgage. It’s a no brainer really isn’t it?


Moving a whole house into one bedroom,

Yeahyeah, we’re barmy I know.

Me, Jordan and the boys are all gonna be living at my parents house for a few months until we move into our ‘forever home‘. This’ll give us the kick up the ass to get our heads down and get our mortgage application back on track (after all I reckon we’ll start to get aggy with each other when there’s 4 of us squashed in to one room anyway). It’ll give us the opportunity to save the remaining amount of our deposit AND to save for brand new furniture!

We move in on friday- wish us bloody luck.

It all makes sense for us to be over there with my parents because when me and Jordan are both working earlies.. that doesn’t mean we have to go a whole week of heart-aching pain and barely seeing the boys.


Anyhow! There ya have it.

Now you know why I’ve been quiet.

You’ll be glad to know that I’m getting my head back into the game (slowly but surely) and I’m gonna MAKE SURE I have ZERO long breaks from wingingmamahood.

I forgot how ace it felt to just natter, n natter, natter.

Until next time..

All my love,

Joanne X


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