The Heartbreaking Transition

Today, you’ve been dreading since day one.

Today, you left your baby crying for your hug as you closed the door behind you.

You attempted to hold it back but burst into tears the second they could no longer see your heartbreak.

Today, you sat in the car and doubted what you was doing.

5 minutes felt the equivalent to 5 hours.

You worried.

What if my babies don’t eat? What if they’re hurt and need mama? What if they’re wondering why we haven’t sung our song yet?

Today, please be over.

Today, you stalked the clock until it was time for a break.

In fact, you didn’t even care so much about those breaks.

You didn’t care about those adult conversations you’d craved so much.

You didn’t even eat..

You text, called, and text again.

You were reassured there was nothing to worry about… but began to worry again just 5 minutes later.

You received photos and videos of your children.

You smiled…but then trembled because you should be there with them.

Break time was over.

Today, you had a lump in your throat for a record breaking 8 hours.

You lost concentration, you snapped.

Today, you realised how much love comes with being a mummy.

You’re in pain. Physical pain.

Today you longed to hold your baby tight.

You wanted to play peekaboo, hold tiny hands and press their squishy cheeks against yours.

Today, you wiped away tears nobody knew about.

You took yourself to the toilets, pulled yourself together, then walked out like you had your sh*t together.

Today, you took a deep breath.

You reminded yourself why you was there.

Today, you spoke endlessly about home,

You were comforted by your own stories.

Today was incredibly tough, you almost quit.

You didn’t.

Today, you made it.

You made your babies proud.

Today, you left them at home but you left for them.

It’s all for them.

Today, you smashed it.

You were braver than you ever knew you could be.

You kicked ass.

Today, your family is grateful.

Ever so grateful.

Today, there’s still pots to be washed and clothes to dry.

None of that matters now.

You walk through the door to THE MOST content smiles you’ve ever witnessed.

Mama was home.

Today, you started work.

Today, is tomorrow.

You get stronger, it gets easier.

I SALUTE YOU.

Weather you’re a stay at home mum or a working mum. Both are challenging, both are emotional and both are ridiculously daunting at times.

Whatever you are.

You’re fu%*ing amazing mama.

BE PROUD.

 

 

How did you feel about going to work?

Are you thinking about starting but finding it tough to pluck up the courage?

Leave me a comment or a message, you’re not alone.

I feel you.

All my love,

Joanne X

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